Infertility or Its Treatment Doesn’t Make a Person Incomplete
Throughout most of history, infertility was thought to be a female problem rather than a male problem. These infertility stereotypes were based on fertility and motherhood since almost all women were housewives. Women who weren’t mothers were not conforming to gender stereotypes, and society often marginalized them, especially if they were unmarried. Society always considered men to be more fertile and masculine, and they both intertwined. However, advanced infertility diagnosis & treatment are now changing the gender based infertility stereotypes.
Today, things are different; we know that infertility problems can occur in both sexes. Most couples going through infertility treatment know where their problems originate from. This new knowledge, however, has not done much to change the infertility stereotypes that still exist. In the U.S. today, approximately 12% of couples have infertility issues.
That’s a larger percentage than at any other time in history. This is affecting enough people that everyone knows at least someone suffering from infertility and has gone through infertility treatment. With this large percentage of the population touched by infertility, we need to start breaking down the old infertility stereotypes as we adjust to this new norm.
Emotional Burden Faced by the Different Sexes
Infertility puts emotional hardship on both men and women. However, for the different sexes, the hurt and disappointment are different. It often plays right into the male stereotypes and female stereotypes. Studies have shown that men, when processing their thoughts about something big and life-changing like infertility diagnosis & treatment, usually use their spouse/partner as their main source of emotional support.
They will generally share their feelings and discuss things with their spouse, but don’t feel the need for emotional support from other people. Men prefer not to share their infertility journey because they feel infertility equates with being less masculine. With many people still believing the typical male infertility stereotypes, it’s no surprise that men don’t want to share their challenge with infertility.
Women Bear the Brunt of Infertility in a Worse Way
Women have always taken the emotional brunt of infertility because the ideal female stereotypes all revolve around motherhood. Both people in the relationship feel stigmatized by their reproductive issues. Women are more concerned about how people will react to their infertility. Many women feel that infertility makes them the odd ones out in their communities, as many communities revolve around children and their activities. If you’re a mom, you’re part of the club.
One interesting thing that has come from recent research is that women are more concerned about how people will react to their infertility diagnosis & treatment. Both partners might share more with friends and family. Men are more willing to share their wives’ infertility issues than their own. Society and gender stereotypes still lean toward people who are parents, and it is in the mainstream. Whereas non-parents are considered outside of the norm.
Because of this, some infertile people make a point of explaining to people, especially friends and family, that they are childless because of infertility, not by choice. If they’re actively trying to change the situation, by fertility medicine or pursuing adoption, then it’s so much better. With these activities, they’re on the outer edge of the tribe and are not considered outside of the norm.
Common Stereotypes of Infertility & It’s Treatment
There is a thinking that infertile men and women are less masculine and feminine than fertile people. It is a common infertility stereotype still prevalent today. This stereotype doesn’t correspond with what medical science knows about infertility. However, cultural norms haven’t caught up with medical science. As society advances, reproductive medicines and infertility treatment advance, more people can have biological children.
Gay couples are a good example of a stereotype that is on its way out. But thanks to changing attitudes in society and advances in reproductive medicine, many gay couples now have the option to have biological children.
Many of these people don’t conform to their gender stereotypes and are putting a whole new face on parenthood. Another form of parenthood that has become more common is being a single mom by choice. These women and men are adults with jobs and support systems. They want to become parents and give a child everything they need. Parenting and reproduction have changed; now we’re just waiting for society and gender norms to catch up.
Gender-Conformity and Infertility Distress
Recent studies have shown that there is a significant relationship between gender role conformity and infertility-related distress. It is a case for both men and women. Many people believe in the prevalent gender stereotypes of society. Such people tend to show more distress when discussing or thinking about their infertility than people who don’t tie their identity so closely to gender stereotypes. People are social animals and want to blend in with the crowd. This is how we manage to live peacefully in societies.
Conclusion
In societies, most of the people identify with the typical male and female stereotypes. So, to break infertility stereotypes, we have to change the way we think about male stereotypes and female stereotypes. We must start valuing people for everything they offer, not just their reproductive abilities.
If you have any questions about male & female infertility and treatment options, please don’t hesitate to reach out to Reproductive Science Medical Center (RSMC) – San Diego, CA. You can always visit us at fertile.com, call 858-436-7186, or schedule a consultation.
